Big Boris

My dog has just swallowed my piano! Well, I’m pretty sure he has.

Because when I looked at Boris earlier, his belly didn’t sag.

But now he’s walking most peculiar - an abnormal lopsided waddle.

He really must have swallowed it - as the doorway’s normally a doddle.

He's absolutely completely wedged - doubt a crowbar will prise him out.

I just don’t understand, or indeed know how? He’s only got a small snout.

But luckily I’ve house contents insurance - and vet insurance too.

But how will I explain it to them? Wait! What’s that noise? A tornado?

BORIS! Oh, dear... I have a confession. It would appear I'm totally wrong.

He hasn’t swallowed my piano at all – it’s been sitting there all day long.

Truth is, he'd raided the fridge. So Boris had let one rip - and boy was he relieved.

However, I’ve had to vacate the house - due to being unable to breathe.

Silly me! Thinking he’d swallowed a piano. He doesn’t even like music!